the life you imagine.

As the new year approaches, I bet I'm not alone in reflecting on the past and dreaming about the future. In so many ways, my life is more than I ever hoped for at age 25. However, there's always more to strive for—better character, new opportunities, more experiences. It's more than natural to dream of things to come, and I believe that God places certain desires in our hearts that he plans to fulfill in His time.

So the question I'm asking myself as January 1 approaches is this: what am I'm imagining for my life in 2012? Briefly, here's what comes to mind first:

• Read more books. This means more book reviews for you girls, and more inspiration for my writing and life. I want to check off every book on my to-read list, and take advantage of my free time this coming year by making time for reading at least most days during the week.
• Write more—for blogs, online magazines and really any other opportunity that comes my way. Know someone who needs a writer (or an editor, for that matter)? Send them my way. In 2012, I think writing (and editing) is going to be my thing.
• Live beautifully. As you know, I recently started writing a series for Darling Magazine about redefining beauty. More than just a good writing idea, it's something I'm learning for myself in a deep way for the first time—and I want 2012 to be a year of progress in that department.

I'm sure that list will get broader and more specific as time goes on, but I think a simple list is a good start. I can't wait to see what comes of this next year—what dreams will come true, what new desires I'll discover, and what kind of opportunities will come my way.

What does the life you imagine look like? What's keeping you from getting there (or at least getting closer) in 2012?

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on kindness.

Good morning, girls! I'm excited to say that part one of my series on redefining beauty for Darling Magazine is up and running. As promised, here's a little preview of the article, and a link to read the whole thing on Darling's website:

What makes something or someone beautiful, really? What is it that makes us stop in our tracks and be left in awe? In nature, we often recognize beauty when it’s unexpected, unique or rare. For example, a rose blooming from a stem of thorns or the sun bursting out of the darkness as it rises. Kindness is like that. It is highly underrated quality in our culture, and something we don’t see as often as we should.

To be kind is to be affectionate, loving, gentle, and of a sympathetic or helpful nature. How many people do you know who exude that?

I cannot write about the beauty in kindness without telling you about the most beautiful woman I know in San Diego. She is radiant beyond belief, always genuine, and refuses to let you walk away from your conversation with her without a hug. Mother Teresa once said, “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.” Rosie is the epitome of that. [Read more...]

UPDATE: Read the whole series here.

Do you know anyone who exudes this kind of beauty? What are some ways you can be more kind in your daily life?

P.S. Don't forget to like Thoughts by Natalie on Facebook!

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christmas highlights.

I don't know about you, but I'm having a hard time getting back into the swing of things this week. Our time at home with family was so relaxing and refreshing, and I find myself wishing I was still lounging on the couch, watching Barefoot Contessa while sipping my morning coffee. Here are a few of my personal favorite moments from our Christmas in the desert...

All dressed up for our family photo, just before the Christmas Eve service.


Opening the first gift—a beautiful Madewell scarf from my parents.


Christmas morning breakfast: avocado toast and hash browns.


Reading by the fire on Christmas afternoon in my snuggly new striped sweatshirt.

I've come to terms with the reality that nobody really expects to get much done during the week between Christmas and New Year's. I suppose I'll just keep that comforting thought in my back pocket as my productivity goes out the window.

What were some highlights from your Christmas?

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merry christmas.

I'm heading home for the holiday weekend today. I can already see the presents under the tree, smell the crisp desert-morning air, and taste the Christmas mimosas. I will be off the radar until Tuesday to spend quality time with the people I love most, but I just wanted to send a little love to each and every one of you.

Thank you for consistently reading, for responding to posts with both funny and profound comments, and for encouraging me with your emails and messages. Your support means the world to me, and I am so thankful for you.

Wishing you a merry Christmas that's full of authentic joy, hope and cheer!

How are you celebrating Christmas this year?

P.S. Don't forget to like Thoughts by Natalie on Facebook!

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grateful, joyful, hopeful.

It seems ironic that I would feel the need to write about thankfulness, especially in light of how messy, intense and chaotic life has been lately. At times like these, when everything on the outside seems to be crumbling and out of my control, I'm so thankful for Brian and for the close friends who support us no matter what.

Although this year has brought us so much fun and joy, we can't help but feel weighed down by certain external circumstances that have come our way. Conveniently enough, we heard a sermon a few weeks about having joy despite those circumstances. It sounds so cliché, and joy seems inappropriate considering all of these situations. However, I've come to learn over the past several years that joy doesn't necessarily mean happiness. Joy supersedes our feelings and circumstances, and overwhelms us with hope that it will all work out in time.

Thus, this is my prayer today: Lord, thank you for your joy, which, in a lot of ways, doesn't make any sense right now. Thank you that joy is present despite the tragedies, frustration and uncertainty, and thank you that we have hope and trust that you will bring all things together for Your good and Your glory.

What are you grateful for today?

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goodness and light.

[photo credit]

Christmas is only a few days away, but it doesn't fully feel like it's time. I want to feel the spirit of Christmas, but it isn't coming as easily as it usually does. Our tree is set up in the corner and decorated with twinkle lights. Red and green are everywhere. Every parking lot has become a hazard zone. Christmas is near, I know, but I need a little nudge to push me into it all the way. Sometimes I forget what this season is really about, and I get caught up in gifts and food and angry people cutting me off at the mall. While those things certainly mark the holidays, they are not the true spirit of Christmas.

When I saw the print above, I suddenly remembered the old classic Do You Hear What I Hear?—specifically these lyrics below:

The Child, the Child, sleeping in the night,
He will bring us goodness and light,
He will bring us goodness and light.

Let's all remember those words over the next few days. Despite the chaos and the holiday parties and the nasty drivers out there, let's remember what December 25th represents: God coming to earth as a human child, bringing goodness and light to this dark and broken world.

In what ways have you seen Jesus bring goodness and light?

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the character of beauty: a series.

Yesterday on Darling Magazine I introduced a new series I'm writing for called "The Character of Beauty." In the coming weeks, I'll be discussing the various qualities that make us truly beautiful women, including kindness, joy, compassion, love, generosity and confidence.

I'll make sure to let you know when they're published, and in turn I hope you'll take the time to read the articles. Not because I want more readers or recognition, but rather so we can do this thing together. I may type the words, but anything truthful or inspirational that comes from them is of God, not me. Let's learn about what real beauty is made of, start living it out, and inspire others to do the same.

We’ve all met that woman–the one who is so radiant we can’t take our eyes off of her. She’s beautiful, but we can’t quite figure out why. Is it her hair? Her figure? Her clothes? After speaking with her for a few moments, we know that her beauty is far beyond the physical. She exudes something lovely, contagious and rare.

I can only imagine how powerful it would be if we all grew into that kind of woman I just described–if we all started accepting who we are, loving our bodies, understanding our true value, and spreading real beauty wherever we go. [read more...]

UPDATE: Read the whole series here.

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be yourself.

[photo credit]

Lately I find myself on a very "be yourself" kick. I can't get enough of it, as cliché as it is. It's something I've heard and been told over and over again, yet it's really sinking in for the first time in perhaps forever. As I said in the it takes courage post, I've spent a lot of my life trying to imitate the people around me whom I admire. And while I think it's important to have role models and strive to be our best selves, we really do need to be just that--ourselves.

How do you battle the temptation to imitate others? In what ways have you grown to love something unique about yourself?

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the standard of beauty.

The following is a video of Blair Linne performing "The Perfection of Beauty", from Christian rapper and self-titled Lyrical Theologian Shai Linne's fourth album, The Attributes of God. Take a few minutes to sit back, soak up and enjoy the poetic words she speaks about true beauty:

"God does not conform to some standard of beauty outside of Himself. In His very nature, God is the superlative of everything good. He is the standard by which all other beauty is to be measured and understood. God's beauty is prototypical, inherent and intrinsic. All other beauty is derived, contingent and dependent."

Shai Linne
The Nature of Beauty

Does your view of God shape your view of beauty? Or is your definition of beauty rooted in something separate from God?

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it takes courage.

This print hits so close to home for me. When I look back at the last five to ten years of my life, I realize I've spent far too much time trying to be someone that I'm not, and not enough time discovering and embracing who I am. Oh, how I wish I could have that time back!

Thankfully, the truth is a little louder and the lies are a little softer than they once were. I see now that there is beauty in the uniqueness of us all, and I'm willing to find out what I'm truly made of.

Why do you think it's so scary to discover and become who we really are?

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book recommendations for holiday reading.

We all love the holidays for so many reasons, but one of my favorites is certainly all of the free time to read the books that have been on my list for months. Since Christmas is just under two weeks away (can't believe it!!) and some of you are already on Christmas break, I thought I'd share my favorites that I've already read, as well as my top must-reads for the new year.

From this year...

• Bittersweet. Beautiful essays on change, grace and learning the hard way. Shauna has a way with words that capture you from the very start (you can read my review here).
• Unbearable Lightness. A raw account of disordered eating from actress Portia de Rossi. Despite it's dark and disturbing truth, it leaves you with hope (you can read my review here).
• Bossypants. A brilliant and comical autobiography-of-sorts by the very witty Tina Fey. Ideal light-hearted reading.
• Surprised by Hope. A detailed overview of the church's beliefs about heaven and and earth in contrast with the Bible's truths about those matters. This book by N.T. Wright has shaped my faith more than any other book, aside from the Bible.
• The Ragamuffin Gospel. My all-time favorite book, written by Brennan Manning. The truth in this book about grace, worth and identity reach deep into my core. I first read it in 2009, and I've re-read it every year since!

For the holidays and early 2012...

• Cold Tangerines. Shauna Niequist's first book—which I somehow managed to skip over completely. A collection of stories that celebrate the extraordinary moments hidden in our everyday lives.
• Is Everybody Hanging Out Without Me? The Office's Mindy Kaling's hilarious autobiography. An absolute must-read (I'm told) for anyone and everyone who likes Tina Fey's Bossypants or thinks The Office is funny.
• The Happiness Project. A memoir by Gretchen Rubin, who spent a year test-driving the wisdom of the ages, current scientific studies, and lessons from popular culture about how to be happier.
• The Help. I'm so behind on this, I know. I've been putting this off for way too long (thank you, Karli, for lending it to me so long ago...I promise to return it soon!)
• Unsqueezed. A witty collection of thoughts to help women discover why God really gave us bodies and what we can do with them to serve him and others.

What was your favorite book of 2011? What will be the first book you read in 2012?

P.S. Don't forget to "like" Thoughts by Natalie on Facebook!

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grandma hilda's christmas cookies.

[photo credit]

This week's recipe is less-so healthy and more-so delicious and easy. That's what the holidays are about, right? These cookies are by far my favorite holiday treat. I've loved them since my childhood, when my Grandma Hilda would make them every year at Christmas and put them in a festive tin to share with us when we came over. For years I marveled over their perfectly sweet and salty combination, and then one year I finally grew up and asked, "Grandma, could you give me the recipe for these to-die-for cookies?"

Let me tell you, that was the best and worst decision I've ever made. Best because they are just so mouth-wateringly wonderful; worst because they are so darn addictive. Girls, you've been warned: if you find yourself in a house alone with these cookies, you just might eat every single one.

Now, without further ado, I give you the recipe:

INGREDIENTS
1 cup butter or Earth Balance
1 cup dark brown sugar
Saltine crackers (with salted tops)
12 oz bag semisweet or dark chocolate chips
Chopped almonds or pecans (optional)

DIRECTIONS
Heat the oven to 400 degrees. Cover a baking sheet with aluminum foil and cover with one layer of Saltine crackers. In a saucepan, heat butter and sugar together, stirring until well incorporated; bring to a boil for 3 minutes and be careful not to burn the sugar. Immediately pour over Saltines and spread evenly with a rubber spatula. Bake for about 5 minutes, until sugar is bubbly. Pull out of the oven and sprinkle the bag of chocolate chips over Saltines and sugar. Once melty, spread chocolate evenly with rubber spatula and sprinkle with almonds or pecans, if you're using them. Allow to cool completely (on countertop or in refrigerator); once the chocolate is completely hardened, break into pieces and keep chilled until serving.

Do you have a nostalgic Christmas treat? (Recipes are welcome!!)

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a moment for my mother.

Good morning and happy Monday, girls! I hope your weekends were restful, and that you're ready to tackle the week ahead. This weekend my parents came to San Diego to visit Brian and I. We ate good food, went to the movies (FYI, I highly recommend The Descendants), and spent quality time catching up on the latest in each of our lives.

While chatting over dinner, she mentioned that CDW, a technology products and services provider, is giving away $250,000 this Christmas season to a range of good causes, including American Cancer Society. You see, my mom has been actively involved with fundraising for ACS ever since my Aunt Paula was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2005 (thank God she is in remission these days!). She coordinates a Relay for Life team with her sisters and friends every year, and she's always thinking of new ways to raise funds that will go toward finding a cure for this terrible disease.

From left: my mom, Aunt Paula and Aunt Denise.

Her latest request is so simple, any of us could do it: "Please take a second and vote for American Cancer Society so that we can get the most votes and receive the $250,000 donation. Thanks."

It takes just 5 seconds to vote, and it makes a world of a difference for the millions of people who are currently battling cancer or who will one day face it.

Will you take a moment to vote and help my mom raise more money for ACS?

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mad about hats.

I've never really been a hat person. Other than my go-to baseball cap that I wear whenever I go running, I've steered clear of hats because I didn't think I could pull them off. At the same time, I've always envied girls who could wear hats with such coolness and class, so I finally decided that it was time I got into the hat game:

[nervously wearing my fedora for the first time]

The most important thing when it comes to choosing the perfect hat is how it fits. I have a really small head, so hats that work for me are few and far between—but thankfully they do exist! Like the sock bun, this is another bad-hair-day solution that enables us all to skip a few more hair washings if we so desire. As the colder air dries our our hair and gives us more less-than-lovely hair days this season, here are some beautiful hats in all price ranges that are worthy of hiding our winter hair:

Albertus Swanepoel for Target Francoise Hat

Merona Felt Cloche Hat

Xhilaration Menswear Trilby with Self Band
(this is the one I have)

Camel Bow Beanie

Nixon Dutch Captain's Hat

Kate Spade Bellevaux Beret

Do you own any non-athletic hats? Which style is your favorite?

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laugh, think, cry.

“To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. And number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special.”

Jimmy Valvano
1993 ESPY Speech

Do you agree with Jimmy? Why or why not?

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healthy girl talk: redefining beauty.

Below is my most recent article for Darling Magazine. You can read the beginning of the article below, or find the full version on their website here.

When we think of beauty, we tend to think about the externals: hair, eyes, skin, body shape.

It’s a habit that has been drilled into us by the culture that surrounds us, but it’s based on a lie.

Beauty is so much more than our physical appearance and it’s time we started redefining it, starting with healthy talk about our bodies. We need to stop pinching, poking and complaining about everything that we perceive as not-good-enough, and start celebrating all that is wonderful about what we have. Not only does this change the way we view ourselves, but it also begins to change the definition of beauty for the women around us.

In her book The Good Body, Eve Ensler describes a time when she was traveling in Africa and asked a native woman named Leah if she liked her body. The woman responded confidently, “Do I like my body? Do I like my body? I love my body. God made this body. God gave me this body. My fingers, look at my fingers. I love my fingernails, little crescent moons. They lead right up to my arms–so strong–they carry things along. And my legs, my legs are long.”

Immediately after hearing this, Eve began to complain about her own body only to be cut off by Leah: “Eve, look at that tree. Do you see that tree? Now look at that tree. (Points to another tree) Do you like that tree? Do you hate that tree ‘cause it doesn’t look like that tree? Do you say that tree isn’t pretty ‘cause it doesn’t look like that tree? You’re a tree. I’m a tree. You’ve got to love your body, Eve. You’ve got to love your tree. Love your tree.” [continue reading...]

What small steps will you take toward redefining beauty today?

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a lofty, beautiful pursuit.

[photo credit]

I saw this on Pinterest and felt a renewed inspiration to pursue these goals with intention and vigor. They are lofty, indeed. But, they are also worthy of the pursuit. The way I see it, we can either let life pass us by, or we can live each day with the intention to do something great.

While the goal of "doing something great" sounds daunting, it's important (especially for those of us who are prone to performance-based worth) to remember that small things can be great things: calling a friend, sending someone a kind note, buying coffee for a stranger behind us in line.

This is what these goals look like to me:

• Live beautifully. Demonstrating kindness, generosity, selflessness, tactful honesty, love, and a joyful heart, regardless of circumstances.
• Dream passionately. Daring to dream the grand and impossible, and pursuing even the wildest of dreams because it feels so wrong to let them slip away.
• Love completely. Forgiving those who don't deserve it, respecting those who are different than we are, and sacrificing time and resources so that others can life fuller, more beautiful lives.

What do these beautiful goals look like to you? In what ways do you pursue them in your own life?

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roasted root vegetable salad.

This week's recipe is my new favorite winter salad, and is inspired by Giada De Laurentiis' recipe on Giada at Home. While I'm sure her version is absolutely to-die-for, it was far too complicated and involved for me to get on board with. Thus, I simplified it and created my own version:

INGREDIENTS
Arugula
Assorted veggies: such as sweet potatoes, parsnips, broccoli, and cauliflower
Quinoa
Edamame, shelled
Champagne vinaigrette

PREPARATION

1. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Chop your veggies and drizzle with olive oil, salt and pepper. Roast for 20-30 minutes, or until they're all soft and slightly crispy on the edges.
2. Meanwhile, cook the quinoa following these instructions.
3. Once vegetables and quinoa are ready, combine in a bowl with a handful of arugula, and 1/4 to 1/2 cup of shelled edamame. Drizzle with champagne vinaigrette and enjoy!

What's your favorite winter salad?

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life is fleeting: coping with the loss of a friend.

Jared and I in high school, after a basketball game.

I found out yesterday that my friend Jared unexpectedly passed away in his sleep earlier this week. I cannot fully express in words the depth of sadness that I feel for his wife, daughter, brothers, and parents. Only a year older than I, he had his whole life ahead of him. If you knew Jared, you would know that he had a bright smile kind heart that made anyone feel important and valued.

When I first found out, I felt confused and baffled. It couldn’t be true, could it? As I read Facebook post after Facebook post of condolences to their family, I started sobbing. Right in the middle of Starbucks. I gathered my things and ran out the door, only to sit in my car and sob some more. As I began mourning the sudden loss of his life, I couldn’t help but remember the other young friends I’ve lost. Chad, Amy, Nicole, my cousin Josh. All died in their twenties, unpredictably and all-too-soon.

Life is so fleeting. We feel like we’re going to live forever, but we never know how long we have. Rather than living in fear that we might suddenly lose someone we love, my challenge to all of us is this: live today and every day to the fullest.

• Let’s forgive those who have wronged us, whether they deserve it or not.
• Let’s tell our family and friends how much they mean to us.
• Let’s call our parents, grandparents and mentors to thank them for the impact they've made in our lives.
• Let’s send a card to someone who needs encouragement.
• Let's take the time to watch the sunset and enjoy God's simple gifts.
• Let's remember that we're never too young to love, inspire and empower those around us.

My thoughts and prayers are with Jared's family this week. Jared, Chad, Amy, Nicole, and Josh: you are all missed terribly, and the world simply isn't the same without you here.

Have you lost a young friend or family member? How has it impacted the way you live your life today?

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the statement necklace.

Good morning, and happy December! Is it really the last month of the year? I simply can't believe it. With 2011 coming to an end, it's no surprise that I've been doing a lot of reflection. Although much of it relates to how I've grown emotionally and spiritually, a teensy bit of it has to do with the superficial reality that my personal style has changed (scratch that—the fact that I've developed any sense of personal style at all!).

In addition to developing love for thick-framed glasses, button-down shirts, wardrobe simplicity, and big buns, there's one thing that has made the biggest impact on my style: the statement necklace. The beauty of wearing a bold piece of jewelry is that the rest of the outfit can stand to be simple. It's a minimalist's dream, and the easiest way to update a whole closet full of clothes without breaking the bank.

Here are some of my favorite styles, courtesy of Pinterest...

Kate Spade Cascade Bib Necklace


Fossil Gold Glitz Statement Necklace


Bauble Bar Champagne Crystal Bib


Etsy Pearl Bib Necklace


Kate Spade Pearl Street Statement Necklace

Obviously metallics, neutrals and pearls are my thing. But what you like might be totally different. The key is finding bold pieces that make simple outfits like jeans and a t-shirt look instantly put-together and fabulous. After all, why spend time fussing over our clothes when we could be out there changing the world?

Have you incorporated statement necklaces into your accessories yet? What do your favorites look like?

P.S. The winner of the November Top Commenter contest is RACHEL JOHNSON!! Great job, girl. I'll be sending you your $25 Starbucks card this week. Thank you everyone for participating. I hope the discussions can continue—I love hearing your thoughts!

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