grace or discipline.

Grace or discipline--which do you need? Lately I've realized that there are different seasons for each, and it always balances out.

If you've heard my story, you know that for most of my life I was a Type A perfectionist. I was a good girl who did (almost) everything right--I went to church every week, prayed every night, studied hard, went to college, ate healthy and exercised often. I followed all of the rules because it just seemed to be the way I was wired.

But somewhere along the line, I realized that by following all of the rules I was doing something wrong. The more I grew in my faith and understood the God of Grace, I realized that I refused to fully submit myself to His love. By following rules and living a (unhealthily) disciplined life, I was missing out on the fullness of the relationship with God that I'd been trying to cultivate.

In time, I surrendered. I let myself make mistakes. I learned to love and to be loved. I ate foods that were once considered "unsafe," and I abandoned my habitual gym habit. Self-discipline ruled my life and shaped my world, but in order to grow I needed to abandon it and trade it in for grace.

Though grace was what I needed, I eventually got lost in it, using grace as license to live as I pleased and not care for my body. Freedom turned into bondage. I felt enslaved to my whims and found it impossible to say no to any and all of my desires.

I finally see that I'm in a season of discipline and if I'm really honest, it scares me a bit. I fear the unforgiving perfectionism of my past and the possibility of turning Godly obedience into rigid self-discipline. But fear is no reason to avoid what's needed. Ultimately we need to trust that whatever season we're in, God leads us lovingly and we experience His freedom in both.

For my whole life I needed grace, and for the past few years (and now still) I've needed discipline. They are two sides of the same coin, always working hand in hand to refine and sanctify us.

Which season are you in, grace or discipline?

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wise words.

I have always loved this quote by Eleanor Roosevelt. It's simple but true, and it calls into question the daily habits we fall into. Are my actions leading toward positive character development? Or are they deterring my ability to become who I was created to be?

I often fall into the trap of extreme, all-or-nothing thinking. I'm either right or I'm wrong. I'm good or I'm bad. I'm perfect, or I'm a failure.

Life is short, but that doesn't mean we should waste it away. Maybe we go astray and make a bad choice (or 183 bad choices), but we always have the opportunity to make the next right decision.

Perfectionists, how do you deal with making less-than-perfect choices?

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thank you, jcrew.

J.Crew is my favorite. I lust over every outfit photographed in their seasonal catalogs, stalk their sale section, and aspire to one day have a closet entirely inspired by the brand.

Classy as their clothes are, they seem to really love itty-bitty-skinny-minnie models. Until now, at least. While reading the most recent catalog last night (yes, I read their catalog as if it were a regular magazine), I was pleasantly surprised to see the beautiful Crystal Renn gracing the pages of the swimsuit section.

Shockingly, the perfectly normal-sized (actually, smaller-than-the-average-woman) Crystal is considered "plus-size" in the modeling world. She began modeling at age 14, but it wasn't until she embraced her womanly figure that her career took off.

She has since been featured in numerous high-fashion magazines, including Harpar's Bazaar and Vogue; has walked the runway for Jean Paul Gaultier; and has appeared in campaigns for H&M, Chanel, Dolce & Gabbana, Saks Fifth Avenue, Jimmy Choo, and Nordstrom.

I am so thankful for her boldness and confidence that inspires and encourages all of us to embrace the beauty of our natural size. Maybe we have no curves. Maybe we're all curves. Maybe we're a pear shape, or maybe we're an apple shape. What matters is not so much what shape our bodies are, but rather if we are willing to respect and honor our bodies or not.

Thank you, J.Crew for taking a leap and publishing photos of a model who we can relate to, and who reminds us that we don't have to pretend to be someone else in order to succeed.

How have you respected your body this week?

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true beauty: allie marie smith.

I have had the privilege of working alongside Allie since I joined the Wonderfully Made Executive Leadership Team in January 2010. She is a silly, passionate, God-loving girl who cares deeply about young women knowing their true worth and value. As an author, nonprofit director, and mentor to many, Allie is a radiant and remarkable woman I'm thankful to know!

What is your greatest passion in life? How do you live it out?

My greatest passion is to see girls discover their true value and worth. As someone who has searched for lasting worth in the world and failed miserably, I’ve learned the hard way we can’t go anywhere or to anyone besides God to define our value. In Christ our worth is already established; there's nothing we do can add to it, or subtract from it.

I try to live this passion out by doing whatever I can to share a message of hope, freedom and worth with as many girls as I can. Whether it’s sharing my story with one girl or a few hundred girls, writing, or working on a project for Wonderfully Made, I try to make it my mission to help girls know they are lovingly and wonderfully made by God with infinite value.

What woman inspires you?

It’s impossible to limit it to just one. Each one of my mentors, role models and closest friends inspire me in a unique way. Collectively they are a constant source of inspiration. I’m inspired by my artistic friends’ creativity and free spirit; my mom’s resilience, discipline and strength has been instrumental in making me the person I am, and my mentor Judy’s humility and loving-kindness inspires me to love unconditionally and know Christ more intimately. Each of my friends stirs me to be intentional in my relationships, love wholeheartedly, live authentically and laugh regularly. That’s a perk about being a girl – instead of being jealous of one another; we have the opportunity be inspired by each other.

How does what you do for a living fit in with your passions and what you feel is your calling?

While I joke about the fact that I’m “technically unemployed” and don’t “make a living” (in the financial sense) directing Wonderfully Made, I consider it my job and believe it’s absolutely in align with my passion and calling. Frederick Buchner defines your calling as “the place where the world’s great hunger and your deep gladness meet.” Directing WM provides me with the opportunity to dream big and creatively reach girls across the country with the message of their true worth.

I love this quote I discovered by Jon Foreman: “When you make a living, don't merely make money. Why settle for cash when joy is on the line?”

When do you feel most alive?

When I’m surfing my long board alongside dolphins, riding horses or belly laughing with my husband or friends.

What do you think is the most challenging thing about following Jesus as a 20-something girl?

Living beyond myself. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in my own world and focus on making myself a perfect, pretty, little life full of nice things and guilty pleasures. But Christ didn’t save us to live a safe, comfortable life. He calls us to be set apart, to live radically, love extravagantly and walk a road that’s not always easy.

What do you think is the most rewarding thing about following Jesus as a 20-something girl?

Amazing relationships and friendships. I never dreamed I’d have such deep, authentic, drama-free and fun-loving friendships or be surrounded by mentors who feel like family. Relationships are never perfect, but when there rooted in Christ they are truly set apart.

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